k o n n i c h i w a !

this is my school girl outfit based on japanese anime-style school girls ^_^

enjoy the few pictures i took XD lots of smiles!

click to enlarge if needed :)

and pictures with my sister :)

 she tried to eat mine :)

ohayo gozaimasu ~

i have to play a japanese game show host today for drama class @_@

im gonna do great haha i've got the part down so well XD

i hope today will be good and fun

something good should happen ^_^

or at least i can hope

hehe

♥

quick fix,

today i was busy :)

i woke up early to talk to Nicko before school,

then i went to the Doctors for a check-up at 9

went to McDonalds and speed-ate i the car on the way to school

i got to school at 10:35 and in math class at 10:40 with 15 minutes left in class

i finished the review in 10 with all correct answeres then packed up and went to 3rd block

now i've answered some emails, replied comments and finished a quiz

and now posting a blog

i am such a busy little woman :) haha

now after school,
i talked to amanda,
got a tweet from a film-maker [!!!]

did 5 edits for people
and helped someone with thier homework :)
im excited :D

Poem - His Most Prized Possession

living in love and hanging by a string,
woven so thin, yet lets my heart ring
like silver bells at Christmas-time,
causing all of the joy
and even though he has my heart,
he doesnt treat it like a toy

he has it more like a vase,
or an urn, shaped from porcelain
keeping it in a special place
where no one can touch it

while some may think selfish
i call it thoughtful
because with him having my heart,
i am no longer distraught-full

because he polishes the porcelain with the finest of wax
and lets it shine bright, these arent little-known facts

no matter the circumstance, he doesnt let dust collect
and he knows the reality of it's fragile effect

so he won't drop it or play around,
and if a heart needs quiet, he wont make a sound

its called a love, not near an obsession
and my love takes care of his most prized possession

my heart.

apparently i lick my pillow when i sleep.

today i spent the whole day with Nicko :)

we went to church together, then to my grandma's house.

at my grandma's, we fell asleep for a while.

i kept waking up cuz of bad dreams >.< blehh!

he was there to reassure me everything was fine though

usually when i have bad dreams, i wake up sad

but waking up and looking over to see him there was really comforting

i really wish i didnt worry so much, or i wouldnt have dreams like that

and nick said that one time i woke him up,

and while i was sleeping,

i started licking the pillow! :o

[e m b a r r a s s i n g]

but he thought it was really cute :)

.................................................

we went to the grocery store because we were hungry,

but got home late and it was pouring rain

and my grandma left us, so my mom got us for evening church

we just ate a bunch of stuff instead of going to youth group

and i still have m&m's and faygo left lol

i'm pretty sure we got the ghetto-est meal ever ahaha XD

-2 microwave pizzas

-funyons, doritos, flamin' hots ~ all covered in hot sauce

-2 faygo rootbeers

- pack of m&m's

and all for under $5.50

now that is called bargain shopping, my friends :)

i look like a total crackhead in this picture XD

but look at his eyes!! they're so pretty <3

we took that in the car on the way home

i didn't want him to leave yet :( or ever

today i finally gave him the book i made in art.

(you will see the covers in the collages section on the navigation)

now its our new project :)

its got about 30 pages, and we're gonna pass it back and forth

writing little things in about eachother or putting things in that we like

its gonna be fun :) i cant wait to see how it turns out

it will have a little of both of us in it

it'll be a surprise every time :) <3 

a year ago today,

was the first time i ever saw my boyfriend.

if you don't know the story of how we came to be, then i'll tell you now.

it all started on this day.

one year ago today, i was with my ex boyfriend and it was his birthday. he had his friend call up someone to come skate with them at Jane Hoop, an elementary school in Mout Healthy. 

two cars pulled up, one was blue and i dont remember the other color.

i was sitting on the back of my ex's truck (back when we were together) and the guys had just gotten out of the car

i looked up, and i saw Nicko looking straight at me

for some reason he just really caught my eye,

he looked extremely familiar but i had never seen him before

and i had never seen anyone who looked like him before

a little later when everyone was skating

i recall the first thing i said to him was that he had hairy nipples...

a  w  k  w  a  r  d 

haha but thats what i said

then, a while later, he asked my boyfriend at the time if he could ollie off the back of his truck

so i did figure that he was kinda trying to get my attention lol

[jump foreward to june]

on the last day of school i get a message on myspace,

it was from Nicko, asking if i remembered him

i couldnt reply unless i added him so i did

so he was like "so i guess you remember me" haha

we exchanged phone#'s and what not

the next day...

i get dumped.

nick said he wanted to make me feel better and asked me to hang out on that monday

so we did,  and it was amazing.

we met in Journey's, he kept trying to buy me things but i didnt want him to...

eventually i settled for a frozen coffee lol

we talked about everything and i was completely comfortable with him

first time i looked in his eyes i just knew

not even kidding, i knew i loved him that day.

he even walked me home,

2 weeks later i finally told him.

and through those 2 weeks, he asked me out over and over and i kept saying no

but he kept on trying, and doing the sweetest things

one time he came to my house on a saturday morning just to give me m&m and rootbeer, 

cuz they were my favorites

things like that, and it just made me love him more

after those 2 weeks, he asked me out over text

i finally said i would say yes but only if he asked me in person

so he came over and asked me :)

together ever since.

and i keep loving him more everyday

i love you baby <3

Sonnet - Holding A Heart So Kind

Oh, the feel of holding a heart so kind
and looking into those eyes i adore
sweetheart, please tell me you love me once more
as our souls drift on and remain entwined
as we hold hands, our fingers intertwined
my darling, i love you from my heart's core
and since when, you've kept my heart from all sore
since that June day when the sun brightly shined
since that day, you have caught my every tear
and cured my illness in all cases
held me and took me away from my fear
knowing your air is mine, my heart races
you confess me your love and let all hear
within this desert, you're my oasis

thinking about some things,

well, alot of things...

i really dont like he-said-she-said things,

or when people do stupid things...

and above all just worried..very worried..

everything will be fine soon

a few changes...

since last night, i now have

~ new banner
~ new song
~ new about me page
~ new affiliates page
~ new banners page

if you would like to be affies, comment, or tag and your link will be on the "friends" page

the banners page has ALL of my previous blog banners all the way from the beginning :)

i hope you enjoy these new changes <3

[please comment & follow]

Painting - Leaf Lady

my art project :) finally finished it. the vines and character are 3D but you may not be able to tell here

[click to enlarge]

Poem - Amanda Werner

the last thing this world needs is another frown or tear
and i dont want to know of another one shed by you, my dear
because you deserve all your happiness and shouldnt have to live in fear
and to prevent the hole going deeper, that is why i'm here

i'll give you my trust if you give me yours as well
and i'll never break it, if i do, send me to hell
because it was immediate that to you i outbroke my shell
and from the beginning to the end, i will continue to wish you well

because you have a special place in my heart
and it hurts to know you've been torn apart
so i'll start helping pick up the pieces here from the very start
because my dear Amanda, this love is my art

written for my dear friend amanda :)

i havent known her for very long, but she's already special to me

click to see her blog :)

nice out :)

this is undedited  :)

this is my default everywhere now lol

i put it on facebook and got 3 comments on it within the same few seconds!

nick even commented it and he never comments my pictures!

then he called me to tell me i was a pretty little thing and that he loves me :)

i feel special :)

Songs Left Unexplained #5: "The Heartless"

a song i have been listening to lately.

this has become one of my favorite songs, it attracted me at first because of the instrumentals which isnt often for most songs i usually listen to the lyrics first.

and the lyrics remind me of nick and last summer...

The Heartless by HIM

Your pain ain't love

Can't you see he's the heartless
Your pain is not love
He's taking it way too far
Don't you know it is wrong
You're the one for me lady
You are the one
If you'd only see in my heart
You'd know all is not lost

Your time is running out
And you still haven't made up your mind
Can't you see he's the heartless
And you're one of a kind

He's the heartless...

You can't see he's the heartless
Your pain won't ever be love
It doesn't matter how hard you try
To you all is lost

He's the heartless..



and now for this



Your pain ain't love
he knew i was hurt and wanted to help me. this line reminds me of the poem he wrote me, when he said "you're falling but i'm falling too, i'm falling but not in the same way as you" he was focusing on trying to help me feel better because i was really hurt but fell in love with me in the process, but he didnt think i loved him back.


Can't you see he's the heartless
Your pain is not love
He's taking it way too far
Don't you know it is wrong
he was making me realize more and more that he was the one for me and not my ex...my ex took it too far and started dating my best friend at the time, and just hurt me more.
You're the one for me lady
You are the one
If you'd only see in my heart
You'd know all is not lost
nick really put himself out there to show me that he cared even after barely knowing me. i knew i barely knew him but he really acted like he loved me, because he did. those last two lines remind me of the last line of that poem he wrote "remember my words, i wouldnt be a mistake..."

Your time is running out
And you still haven't made up your mind
Can't you see he's the heartless
And you're one of a kind
he asked me out over and over again and i just wouldnt say yes. after a little while i really thought my time was running out. i needed to make up my mind to either confess to him that i absolutely adore him, keep being friends or just stop talking to him so i dont get hurt...but i made up my mind and i had to tell him i love him. i knew that it would be worth it. and it has been more than worth it. he really does make me feel like i'm something and i love the feeling ♥

He's the heartless...
he is...he came to my friend's house and completely ignored me and everything i said...we used to be best friends and now im nothing..and he said he doesnt know what love is, and just proves over and over that he really is heartless.


You can't see he's the heartless
Your pain won't ever be love
It doesn't matter how hard you try
To you all is lost
that last verse would have happenned if nick had never saved me. i would be so messed up and hurt, it would have been horrible. it happenned to me once before, but now it will never happen again


He's the heartless..
he is. but my love isn't ♥

today i get to be out of uniform because i got on the Honor Roll :)

be very proud of me :D

and i haz pop tart :)

Drawing - Leaf Fairy

first layer, watercolors

second layer, colored pencil

axis chemicals photoshoot ~

rob (guitar)

rose (vocals\bass)

link (drums)

rose

rob

link

tell me watcha think :)

stupidest almost-fight ever.

i walked into second block and sat down.

Travis and Steven came in and sat down.

then Nikk came in and sat down.

a minute later, Tony came in.

~time for the stupid part~

Tony comes in and starts trying to pull Nikks desk away because he wanted to sit there,

no words exchanged.

Nikk gets out of his chair, a little mad obviously

(i would be to)

he said "If you're gonna be a little b**** about it then go ahead and take it"

and he threw his book onto another desk and got up

but instead of just sitting down, Tony pushed him at the wall and threw Nikk's book into the hallway

so Nikk pushed him back then started trying to step over the chair to go get his book

and Tony keeps going and pushes a desk into Nikk again

then Miss Kirkham told them to get out.

it was so stupid!

he could have just sat in one of the other 20 empty desks around the room

it was so immature, it made me mad

what the hell happened? Tony used to be cool

we used to be really good friends too, and then he changed

i cant believe i ever went out with him or was even friends with him now

he was more mature when i first met him,

FRESHMAN YEAR!

that was just dumb.

and even worse, Nikk was in danger of force-failing because of attendance

and Tony just got him suspended for 3 days so now he's really gonna fail...

and he's a senior, so that means he wont graduate and he's already stayed an extra year

i really dont think thats fair at all

that was so thoughtless of Tony to do

hopefully they cut Nikk some slack cuz that's just not fair

it wasnt even his fault and he wasnt trying to fight at all

hopefully they still let him pass

420

today is 4/20

a.k.a.

national pot-smoking day 

and guess who's not smoking...

me and nicko :)

~

doing a photoshoot for rose's band today

i cant wait :)

upset about today :( excited about tomoro :)

this morning i woke up really tired.

pretty much didnt do anything to groom myself and then left for school

i had gotten in a bad mood from the night before

i was online and put my status as "i love you, and i miss you,"

then my ex has the nerve to put "nope" so i was pretty pissed

because:

1.never was i talking about him

2.he's a dick to me now

i had just got off the phone with my pretty boy Nicko so i set that as my status :)

but no he had to go ruin it. and make me mad.

but that's taken care of, so on with life.

the school day went quite well so i was in a good mood when i got out

but when i came home, my sister wasnt home which was wierd,

when she got here she said she forgot her key...which is bad

since i dont have a key & she's the one who lets me in

she said she was going to grandma's to go get the key so i took out my laptop to pass the time

little did i know, grandma came home

then picked up tehya and went to burger king

i was sooo sad! i cant believe they left

i called tehya because she hadnt come back after 20 minutes and found out she forgot all about me!!

she came home and didnt even bring me anything

so she gave me the fries from her kids meal.

and after all that,

she didnt even have the spare key.

so my laptop died around 4 and i was there until 9:15 bored crapless.

~~~~~now for the good news~~~~~

tomoro i am doing a photoshoot for the band Axis Chemicals :)

it's my friend Rose's band, and i get to watch thier practice too

she plays bass and does lead vocals

i'm going right after school to her house so she can get ready & then we're going to the practice

i'm excited :)

this is the second band i'll be the photographer for,

the first is Deus Mortom (use the search on the sidebar for the post of thier photos or go to the November archives)

i've also made some new friends on here :)

check out thier blogs:

Amanda

[http://amandakrystalx3.blogspot.com]

Candy Tuft 

[http://candyunnietuft.blogspot.com]

they're very sweet girls :)

i love them already!

sushi lunch ♥

sushi and mango ice cream :) favorite things to eat <3

next time i'm getting green tea ice cream hehe <3

~ for Rabbito-Chan ~

I edited a picture of you ^_^

hope you like it

[click here to see]

this chick bad, this chick hood; this chick do stuff that ya chick wish she could :P

i told Nicko on Friday that i would be "ghetto" for a week lol

there's my hood picture :D

i am half black but people always call me white because of the way i talk and act

but i dont know how to talk or act anyother way, thats just who i am and how i was raised

but oh well, haha

and i found out i like Nicki Minaj...

i took a screenshot of her and edited it because i think she is just adorable ~

i was reading about her the other day and i thought it was cool that she is trying to get the music world used to having a female rapper and focuses more on rapping than trying to look cute, which is why she makes wierd faces all the time and stuff. i admire that :)

and im starting to really like my hair style :)

but im still gonna straighten it soon

trying new hair-style?

i've been doing the 2-braids thing for a little while...dont really like my curls but whatcha think? :)

thank you Blaze ^_^

List 3 things I love about myself:
my second half (nicko♥)my double-jointed fingers :Di really dont love anything about myself

Post a picture I love:

Tag five people to pass this award to:Rabbito [http://rabbitochikachieco.blogspot.com]Candy Tuft [http://candyunnietuft.blogspot.com]Rineko [http://rineko-lalala.blogspot.com]Chloe [http://chipmunk2011.tumblr.com]Blaze [http://bbyrumble.blogspot.com]


♥

guess what i found on my couch yesterday...!

a cute boy with pretty eyes, long bouncy hair and a LaSalle school uniform

Nicko came over :D and i cooked for him

i made Chili 3-Ways :) he said he liked it :)

the first time i really have cooked for him

we played around with my sister and we painted a little

it made me happy to see him :)

and i kinda attacked him before he left but he didnt mind lol

i got super tired and fell asleep early for some reason 

but i slept really well ^_^

now i'm at school....

because the home internet doesnt work again -___- *

hopefully it will soon though...

cuz i dont like this stupid "i have to go outside to get wifi" crap

>.<

RIP Peter Steele :(

he is one of my all-time favorite musicians

im honored that i got to see him in person before...

click here to see my photography from the Type O Negative Concert

[http://sincerelyberry.blogspot.com/2009/10/concert.html]

he was thier bassist and Vocalist...

RIP :(

blahhh..

in a kind of bad mood :/ im scared-ish right now..

and nervous and things :(

but i found this picture from the summer i thought was pretty :)

but i just edited it today

look at how young i look 0_0 ....o jeez lol

i miss nicko!! i might be going to watch his soccer practice today :)

i hope i can!! either way i wanna see him today

i've been around so much lately, i hope his parents arent mad at me...

they're probably getting tired of me >.<

that's one of my favorite quotes from the song Razorblade Kiss by HIM ↑

it always stuck out to me

i think im gonna start a quotes section on here :D

what do you think? :)

old webcam picture

from about a month ago

bright side award :D

1.Give a top 10 list of the things that make you happy.
Nicko's Love
Sentimental things
Art
Music
Writing
Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough
Malts & Milkshakes
Chinese&Japanese Buffets
Sushi
Mango Ice Cream

2.Give a top 5 list of trivia or facts about yourself
my birthday is 10 days before Valentines Day
I play 4 instruments and sing
my favorite band is HIM
i am extremely scared of thunderstorms
*i am legally engaged...!

3.Share the award with only 5 friends and ask them to do the same thing.
Rabbito (http://rabbitochikachieco.blogspot.com)
Chloe (http://chipmunk2011.tumblr.com)
Kashie (http://kaseysgotsomethingtohide.blogspot.com)
Rineko (http://rinekolalala.blogspot.com)
Blaze (http://bbyrumble.blogspot.com)

5.Link the blogs you choose and link the blog of the person who awarded you.
already done ↑ ↑ ↑
thank you rabbito for this award ^_^

life hasnt been bad at all lately,

but i miss my nicko :(

i havent seen him for 2 days >.<

maybe i can see him today...i hope :D

spring break was great because i got to see him all the time

and the week after i did too

lets keep this trend goin baby!!

cuz i like it :)

Photography - Good Morning

Photography - Clouds (500th POST)

took this at Nick's soccer game :)

#17 :)

Nick went to church with me today :D

he was getting a little aggravated with me towards the beginning of the day because i was in a bad mood kind of and the people in the room were making me irritated which irritated him

it didnt take me too long to get in a better mood

but after i felt better i was scared to hold his hand because i thought he was mad :(

but when we were in class he wrote "kitty" with a heart next to it on his hand

so i wrote "LOVE NICK" across my fingers

he smiled at me and showed me he wasnt mad and held my hand

during the service, Sam said we could sit somewhere else instead of me doing the sound

so me and Nick straight up ate a loaf of bread lol

and i had half a cookie and dr.pepper, he had Mountain Dew

he brought quarters specifically to buy me Dr.Pepper :)

aint he cute? <33

i got to watch Nicko play soccer for the first time today :)

i was happy to finally see him play

every time i saw the number 17 i was like 

"aww, thats my baby!!"

he's so cute bouncin around everywhere with his hair floppin in the wind

 ^_^

hehe he's so adorable <333

his team lost by like 1 point :(

i tried to keep score but i got distracted by the people on the sidelines talking and later his sister and her dog Bella

....which eventually peed on me -_- haha

we went to Frisches to eat and then Nicko showed me all of the graffiti around the area on the way home

or i thought we were going home lol

we went to the Goody Shop and got the best chocolate shakes EVER

i swear they're the best <33

i want another one now >.<

when i got home, i didnt wanna be there

i missed nick already >.<

then for some reason i felt the need to tease him lol

then he called me and i got to hear his cute voice

^_^

Photography - Frog and Plane

taken at Nick's game

Poem - Yet You Are The One To Break It

don't stare at me...

don't come in my direction...

you wrap around my heart and squeeze it until it pops

though i am not close to you, you are always around me

taunting me

haunting me

but most of all

hurting me

because you are everywhere

you step onto the ground before me and attempt to make me fall

                                       and you try to trip me because of a fall

                                                         to trip me on guilt

                                                                           a guilt i should not possess

there you go,

you've gotten your revenge

i didnt know who you were and hurt you by accidnent

                                   but you hurt me on purpose

you've scarred me with out a single touch

and now you've carved your name into veins as proof that you were here

  its set in stone

and set in blood

                        or soon to be

                                            once you finally kill me

because i know what you say

      and i know what you have said before

      and i know your name

                                       they all hurt to hear

                                       there are things that remind me of you

                                                              

i never loved you and you never loved me,

                    you never had my heart, never anywhere close

               yet you are the one to break it

anytime i hear of you, another piece falls off

when i see your name, or anything near it, my stomach turns

did you know i was hurt? well, that doesn't matter

                               and well, you wouldn't care anyhow

                               and well, you got what you wanted

i hate to sleep

i hate it because of you

             because of you i wake up feeling sickened

             because you rear your head into my dreams

             because you can turn a perfect day into a nightmare

because of you i have to hold back my tears

because of you i realized a heart once mended has had the seams ripped

                                                                                                 ripped again

a dead soul resurrected is slowly being laid to rest again

by you singing a lullabye that could soothe only the hard of hearing

a song that weakens me

                                   because i was strong until you

i heard you were gone for good...

he told me and he's happy he is free...

then i realized 

that now i was the one trapped

when i looked up and saw your name

when i looked over and saw your name

                                                         and i saw you everywhere

i never loved you and you never loved me,

                    you never had my heart, never anywhere close

               yet you are the one to break it

anytime i hear of you, another piece falls off

when i see your name, or anything near it, my stomach turns

did you know i was hurt? well, that doesn't matter

                               and well, you wouldn't care anyhow

                               and well, you got what you wanted