am i pretty?

(webcam pics)

only edited one.

(camera pics)

actually i like the webcam pics alot better...

which do you?

Happy Birthday Tehya!!

my amazing little sister :)

give here blog a look!

click here

new video from us today:

Poem - Five Butterflies

no sun in the sky
no snow on the ground
no light in the dark
not even a sound
late in the night
after my cries
its just me and my five
butterflies

they come when im happy
and bring me more joy
than other something
than any other toy

the fly next to me
wherever i go
distracting me from sadness
i would say so
then after my walks
and relieving sighs
now its me
and my five butterflies

UGHHH, EXAMS.......

today was our first out of 2 exam days at school

i got a 44/50 on my first block exam, GO ME!!

....but i got a big fat ZER0 on my second block exam -_-

cuz the teacher is a citag lol (text message mispell of the "B word")

she didnt even tell me who i was supposed to do the exam on,

so i couldnt even do it!! ugh...

but i know i'll pass 4th block and i dont have an exam for 3rd

pretty sure i got an A or B to pass 1st block for the year :)

one credit for me!! and im almost done with history online

im doing better :) im proud of myself :)

after school i went to get coffee with my grandma and she got me a cup for home

then got me some breakfast too

wasnt the best, but man was i hungry!!

even after i got those pancakes today in 2nd block

speaking of 2nd block,

my teacher awarded me as

"The Next Lady Gaga"

...........just kill me now hahaha

Nicko makes me a very happy girl <3

♥ we've seen eachother 3 days in a row now ♥

ehh..

nothing special today i guess..

but i saw nick again which was good.

that sums today up basically,

i was listening to cradle of filth...

its a bad pic but it was taken on webcam what do you expect

tomoro should be better

today was a good day :)

i hung out with nicko today, for the first time in like 3 weeks

and we had fun ^_^

we were hangin out and cuddling and he was being cute

it was funny though because we were doing something and then i crawled away somewhere

then peaked around the corner and stared at him with wide eyes

he gave me a wierd look then smiled and acted like it was nothing XD

the look on his face makes me XD XD XD

soi crawled to another part of the room and did it again lol

everything about today was good :)

and we agreed to start seeing eachother every wednesday

that way we will always see eachother at least once a week :)

i cant wait till i see him again <3

i've been wearing a hoodie all day but this was under it

my metallica shirt ^_^

random kissy picture XD

i look wierd 0_o haha

"I'll save you, i'll be your knight in silver skinny jeans"

the title is a quote by Nicko from this morning

and so far that's the only good thing that's happened today

 and probably will be the only good thing.

 Today has just been pure crap.

4 Words:

I

HATE

GETTING

DITCHED.

i just feel lonelier and lonier every day.

i have no life...

i stay home alone and draw,

 write and play intruments,

sing and do a bunch of other stuff

 because no one ever wants to hang out with me

or they'll say they do then make other plans...

that right there is why i never get my hopes up

 because they just fall in the end

variations

3 variations of a photo i took the other day

i'm still trying to figure out photoshop and i played with this a little

this first one is unedited ↓

this is the first edit ↓

this is the edit of the first edit ↓

3 different variations and none of them look all that good

the last one is my pick for the best of the three

right now i'm about to do my Cheer-up Plan.

what is that?

its doing a bunch of things that i like all at the same time to distract myself from having a bad day.

because i am not at all in the greatest mood.

my Cheer-up Plan:

Listening to playlist of my favorite songs & playing bass/singing

Drinking Root Beer and eating microwave pizza

Going through good memories in my head

Writing poetry and watching .hack//sign re-runs

listening to "Rain" on Orisinal.com

it helps a little..

try making one yourself and see if it works for you

Horoscope

  A     Q     U     A     R     I     U     S  

It's normally easier for you to be logical than emotional, 
but the Moon's visit to your sign 
can bring intense feelings to the surface now.
 You may not be fully in control 
as you bounce back and forth between your head and your heart.
 Once you have expressed your needs, 
you might overcompensate by acting in a cool, intellectual manner.
 Your hot-cold mood swings could confuse others, 
so do your best to find a rational middle-of-the-road approach.


~


actually, its alot easier for me to be emotional than logical
maybe thats not good, i'm not sure
as Ville Valo has said:
"I'm not a big thinker, I've got a big heart and a small brain."
and i stick by that quote of his,
because that is exactly how i am
(if you guys havent been able to tell already)
i am trying to find a middle-of-the-road approach
but i'm not entirely sure how to do so,
i'm good with compromise so that might help
and to a certain extent, i can keep my cool
(very far extent, by the way)
i just wish things were a little easier sometimes,
but i don't want to express my needs..
so i wont.




sorry horoscope, you are a little wrong this time.

the only words i have to say:
Nick, I miss you.

pictures from around 8 tonight...

me and my camera were bored

i dont see to take as many pictures as i used to...

ugly kissy face...

lyrics from the second verse of heartkiller on the last picture

UPDATE

all i have to say about today:

this morning was great

school wasnt bad

after school was alright

dinner was frustrating

after dinner i was hurt

and tonight i almost lost my mind

i have hope.

tommorrow has to be better.

*venting* sometimes some girls make me mad...PLEASE STOP FLIRTING WITH MY BOYFRIEND!! >=O

WARNING:

this is a mean and selfish post...read at your own risk

>.<

Girls make me mad.

i do not like when girls flirt with my boyfriend.

i do not like when girls flirt with my boyfriend

then say he's the one doing it and not them.

i do not like when girls flirt with my boyfriend

 then say he's the one doing it and not them

and then are nice to my face.

i do not like when girls flirt with my boyfriend

then say he's the one doing it and not them

and then are nice to my face

and they have a boyfriend.

i do not like when girls flirt with my boyfriend

then say he's the one doing it and not them

and then are nice to my face

and they have a boyfriend

and still say they love thier boyfriend,

even though they are flirting with mine!!

ITS A BUNCH OF BULLSH*T

ok so here's the deal,

I DON'T FLIRT.

the only person i flirt with is Nicko, and im only trying to flirt

i dont really know how..

if you already have a boyfriend, then why would you flirt with any other boy?

especially a boy who already has a girlfriend...

Honestly, i don't think any guys are attractive

besides Nick and the exception of Ville Valo

i love Nick with all my heart

and no one can compare to him in my eyes,

i dont ever look at any boys the way i look at nick

and i dont think of anyone else the same way

i'm not interested.

if you love someone,

how can you think of anyone in anyother way besides a friend?

i understand that most people do think other people are attractive,

but i am not one of those people

and even if you think someone else is attractive,

you shouldnt make a move if they're taken

or even worse if YOU'RE taken yourself!

and i hate when people get things blamed on them when they shouldnt

i've been through enough of that in my life

so when it happens to other people i show sympathy to them

i just really don't understand why some people cant just settle down

maybe it makes them happy to flirt with other people..

that are taken...

but what about the person on the other end?

shouldnt they care that they are hurting the other person (me)?!

i get paranoid about things like that

i'm finally happy

i have the guy of my dreams

he's perfect for me

we're madly in love

if anyone ruined that, i don't know what i'd do

i do trust my boyfriend nowm so i know he wouldnt let anyone do that

but sometimes i still have the fear in the back of my mind

because it has happened to me before

my biggest fear is losing him

he is my love and best friend

and i think people should care and stop trying to jeopardize my life..

losing him would be like losing everything to me

he's the only person i talk to about truly everything

he loves me and shows it, every day

despite what others may think...

alot of people dont know how we really are

some people have never seen us together

if they saw the way he looked at me

they would understand how important we are to eachother

the look he gives me is unmistakable

anyone could tell it's love

note to all of you girls:

please dont flirt with other people's boyfriends, it may be your hobby but it makes people mad.

especially me :( if you're gonna flirt with someone's boyfriend

flirt with your own!!

and for you single girls...

there are alot of single guys out there

go flirt with them, i'm sure they wouldnt mind :)

just dont flirt with my boyfriend...

just ask him if he has any single friends you can flirt with lol

problem : solved

^_^

the big wednesday!

i started typing on my new story after the wifi connection was lost

but i got distracted and started messing with my webcam

(click to enlarge if you must)

obviously i got bored on photoshop too...i mean i was in the car for an hour

i actually smiled in my id picture 0_o

after i got my ID, then we were going to the BX

which is the Base Exchange

top go shop

but....

i saw a restaurant called Flying Tiger

turn out its a Chinese place ^_^

we turned around and went there

this is what i had

wonton soup ^-^

and General Tso's chicken, a chicken wing, fried rice and egg roll

tehya got fried dumplins and eggroll

look how tiny my egg roll is!

isnt it kawaii?!!

yes!! sukoshi egg roll! :D

hehe using japanese to describe chinese food XD

then we went to the bx

and i tried on these clothes

i got them ^_^

tell me what you think :D

afterwards we got ice cream and then went home

not too bad of a day, i guess :)