describing me.
view my [[twitter :: resource site :: msn :: youtube :: boyfriend]]

Saturday, April 30

pale platforms

i love hot topic.

10 Day You Challenge

  1. Chalupas
  2. Spicy Tuna Rolls
  3. Alcapurrias
  4. Dumplings
  5. Japanese Fried Rice

Friday, April 29

10 Day You Challenge

  1. nick's house
  2. the mall
  3. Don Pablo's
  4. Burger King
  5. The Bronx, NY
  6. Brooklyn, NY
  7. Ponce, PR

my drink matches my jacket~

i really love this pic for some reason ^_^

my friend brought me a green tea today,
it tastes pretty great ^^ and matches my jacket xD
i like my hair today :)
i'm really happy today! today is our senior luncheon,
we get out of all our classes after 3rd bell
and we had to dress up
im wearing my last year easter dress with the teal bolero
cant wait!!!
i've been thinking about it all night
dreamed about it too <333
its gonna be so fun and so perfect :) i'm gonna take tons of pics!!!
this is gonna be a cute page in my book :)

Thursday, April 28

found one of my old drawings on photobucket o_o

cant believe i found this xD
i drew it in 9th grade
and for some reason typed a caption
i did it for all of my drawings back then,
in the myspace days xD

i have a huge collection of anime originals for photoshop and cute quotes / funny gifs / backgrounds,
makes me wanna make layouts xD
i love my blog though :)
its like myspace plus xD

well, now that i'm getting the hang of making layouts :3
i feel like re-doing mine, but i like it too much D:
haha i'm hyper :D i have a mountain dew!

i miss nick :(
i want it to be tomaro already!
love you bby >.< muahh!

ttyl everyone!

10 Day You Challenge

  1. to go on a date.
  2. to go to a fancier date.
  3. to have a perfect 2 years anniversarry with nick.
  4. to be left alone by certain people.
  5. to be happier.
  6. to go to a new dance studio.
  7. to graduate highschool.

DATE TOMARROW!!! YAY!!! +My new blog song :) ♥ ♥

My blog just got THAT MUCH more personal :)
 my babyboy made me my blog song 
yes, that's right :) my song is in fact by nicko!
 he raps :) and he can sing too,
he wrote this song about us 
it's so cute :D
~ he's so super sweet ~
speaking of that cutie,
i have a date with him tomaro :) !!!
i cant decide what kind of makeup i wanna do >.<
we're gonna take those cute photostrip pics :)
i wanna look pretty but idk which way i wanna look D:
we have....
simple and smiley
thin eyeliner with only foundation and pink lipgloss
its not sticky :) just smells good xD

anime blush
winged eyeliner on top only with pink cheeks and pink lips

cute racoon :)
makes my eyes pop! heavy black eyeliner with navy shadow to bring out the brown

anime, racoon or smiley?? ahh D:
i like racoon the best xD

but i cant decide!!!
and i know its wierd that i name my makeup combinations >.<
imagine if you knew them all xD this is just my top 3! haha xD 
i'm too excited for the actual date to think about it right now xD
i keep listening to my song :)
listen to the lyrics, he wrote them himself <33
it's a super sweet song :) <333
i'm happy right now ^^


and dont forget to join m♥shim♥shil♥ve!
we have 3 active members i think, and altogether 9 members :)
i'm trying to get this going!
please join, girls :)

Wednesday, April 27

10 Day You Challenge

  1. thunderstorms / tornadoes
  2. being chased
  3. all dogs. even puppies.
  4. getting close to non-online people.
  5. being forgotten.
  6. not being forgiven for things i do.
  7. some one close to me dying.
  8. myself.


i have 59 followers :D who wants to be 60? xD
but seriously :) that just made my day <333


**i think  im gonna stop smiling in pics forever...i hate my smile**
life is messy right now.. but i am trying to fix it.
my basement keeps flooding, it is getting really horrible, bit i have an idea.
there is a small room in the basement, big enough for just a bed and some shelves, with a deep closet next to it.
my plan is to move out of my room and move into that small room, it's elevated about half a foot so it wont flood like the rest of the basement, and we can use my old room for storage so our things dont get messed up.
it's perfect...plus it will get me organized with the smaller space and help motivate to unpack more
so then even if the basement does flood more, our things wont get ruined.
on the 30th (saturday) me and nicko have a mall date :)
we're going shopping and he wants to buy me stuff >.<
but it's gonna be fun :)
im gonna get new guages and some cute underwear and stuff xD
and play on the escalators :3 heeheehee yeahhh ^^
&heartsl ♥ doing it on the 30th cuz its our anniversary :) 1 year and 10 months ♥ ♥
he wrote me a song...
it's so beautiful ♥
he put alot of emotion into it
i almost cried when i heard him play it over the phone
and then when i plugged in my headphones
i heard everything else i didnt hear yet
at the end you can hear him crying..
and when he cries its really a crazy thing..
the fact that he has cried infront of me before was a really insane thing to me, because it has only happened one time that i've seen him cry
that sort of vulnerability from him made me actually feel closer to him
like he really does need me and depend on me
he was like a totally different person, and after i calmed him down,
he had this aura of pure innocence that i had never seen from him
he was looking up at the sky and talking about how pretty the stars were
and how he could see all of them...then he hugged me tightly and we just layed together
kind of like a child...maybe the only moment i felt like he was actually younger than me
but it was really special to me..
despite how crazy that day was, i'll always remember that moment
him crying in the song reminded me of this a little,
feeling like he really needed me..
hearts; it's my favorite song ♥
i also looked at more mp3 players:
wholesale 4GB Couple Necklace MP3 Player Set(2 Pieces)/ Lover's MP3 HF118
its shaped as a heart/people kissing :) 2 piece set
4GB, 43.99 and comes with earbuds
wholesale 4GB QVGA Panel All-In-One Media Player (DV/MP3/MP4/Game/Camera/FM Function) 2 Colors Available (KLY241)
plays music and videos and has a cam :) a must have!
4GB, love love love it! so cute :) i want the pink one!! ♥
found them on lightinthebox.com

maybe on later <3

Tuesday, April 26

who am i? have you ever asked yourself that question? well, sometimes you cant help it, you know...when your self-esteem gets the best of you and then you're stuck. it sucks. but it still happens. i think everyone knows how it feels...if they say they dont, then they're lying. when you end up being so down you wish you could be anyone but yourself. i always wished i wasn't me...i always wished my hair was straight, or my skin was lighter or to be taller...i always hated everything. i'm short, i'm racially confused, my mind is all fucked up, i have "talents" that will never take me anywhere in life and  my family is such a mess that for a while i didnt even want one of my own. when i think about my life, the first word that comes to mind is deprived. because i was...deprived of the truth, deprived of reality, deprived of real friends, deprived of real life, deprived of a dad and deprived of a loving family... i'm just entirely unhappy right now :( i need some really good fun in my life, i need to do things that i WANT. i don't ever do what i want. i'm so drained from yesterday.. on the other hand, i really like that picture,

10 Day You Challenge

  1. nicko
  2. dates
  3. rain
  4. pocky
  5. ramen
  6. ChocoTaco's
  7. baking
  8. taking pictures
  9. making things

horrible day :( but getting better..

yesterday sucked super :(  i had a project for school, ended up failing it because i was supposed to interview a teacher and she didnt reply to my email :( so there went that...she kept changing what she said too which made it that much more confusing :/ then when i got home, me and nick got into a really big argument-thing and i was just hurt by alot of things and it came out, and plus a feeling i didn't want to admit because i was scared of what he would do and it messed with his head..i didn't mean to :'( i feel so bad about it.. then a plumber had to come to turn our hot water back on and almost had to give up a 50$...turns out all i have is 50$ :( so much for shopping.. then we looked downstairs and my grandma figured out that our basement is totally flooded...including pictures from my childhood that i had been looking for that i've never seen :( i was about to cry ..i had a horrible headache re-visit from crying (and the kid hitting me with an umbrella at the restaurant yesterday) and my whole body was just aching, while we had to clean out the entire basement of all of the wet boxes. i just wanted to sleep...but i couldnt...i was wishing nick was there to lay down with me and make me feel better, just like last spring when he came over to make me better when i was sick, he brought over my favorite game and came to my house to lay down and play it with me. it was really sweet.. and he's writing a song for me now, he's been rapping lately.. he was listening to alot of deep emotional style beats for it. and he wants to go to the mall with me soon too, seems like he wants to go today, and i hope its today :) i still feel bad about what happened though :/ i think seeing eachother will make it alot better..it's been too long.. we're supposed to hang out today. not even lightning can hold me back.
till later...ttyl

Monday, April 25

10 Day You Challenge

stolen from Koo...I like doing posts like this.
Ten Secrets:
  1. i really love sweets, even though i try not too
  2. i'm sensitive about my weight, but not being fat...being too skinny
  3. i hate my whole body, i wish i could change it.
  4. i wish i wasn't black. sounds harsh, but that's why it was a secret.
  5. i secretly wish that someone was obsessed with me.
  6. i secretly want to be an entrepreneur
  7. i'm really shy about showing my affection.
  8. i'm afraid of leaving my house.
  9. i am always afraid that someone i care about is dying and isnt telling me.
  10. i absolutely hate that my life didn't go how i planned. only one part wasnt planned, and thats the only part going right, i love that.


been a long boring weekend...
i've just been in a bad mood the whole weekend :/
partially because its that special time of the month
got a visit from my little "monthly friend" ugh
i went shopping on saturday ~or was it friday?
and got my 2 dresses, a sun dress which i wore for easter and a dress for the wedding in May
it's gorgeous :) i need to fix the straps though...they're a little too long
but the dress is teal, and the perfect teal that i love :)
nick suggested that color, he thinks it suits me best i guess
i agree :) it makes my skin look softer
and with my hair black, it does wonders for my skin :)

well, today i am not going to dance class.
last week, there was a bit of an issue
see, the past 3 weeks, this new girl has been coming to the class...and she does absolutely NOTHING. ( if you saw my completely profane msn status last week, this is what it was about. ) 
i can usually get the dances pretty fast, but sometimes i have to step out
i have to watch to get the steps, then i come back in and rock it
well, she complained to me saying that "people in the class feel uncomfortable with having 'an audience' and need me to participate" ...I DO PARTICIPATE! i have never sat out for more than 1/6 of a song >:/ and she said NOTHING to the girl that does anything.
then she went over and complained to me my mom.
i confronted her, i said "i'm an adult. you just talked to me, you dont have to run and 'tell on me' to my mom." my mom defended me, because she knows i do things, she watches from a hidden room at the top floor. that same lady made her go up there because she decided she didnt want people to watch the class. she's not even the teacher. and no one has any problem with me in class or the way i learn, so it's just her. and she's the office manager, and she for some reason thinks that entitles her to do whatever she wants.
my mom said she might tell the directer/owner, who she's good friends with, who could get her removed...she said she's probably about to be removed anyway, i dont really wanna go into it.
my mom said that i can dance at somewhere else, because she was also pretty pissed about what happened too. my mom is one of those people who doesnt stand for being mistreated like ever.
so pretty soon we're gonna check out Planet Dance downtown,
it's a dance school, it costs a little bit more than the one i'm at now...but the studio looks really nice
the faculty there is really cool too, they have thier experiences listed on thier page on thier website and thier website looks really cool!
and they have musical theater...ahh :)
i'm really looking forward to it.
i was going to dance there this summer anyway, so i guess its not bad.
and nick said maybe we can go on a date today :)
and when the new pirates of the carribean comes out we're going to see it together :)
hopefully more dates to come...
i love dates....

well i'm gonna mooch money off my friends to buy ice cream at lunch lol
or maybe chips, because school doesnt have what i want
i am craving a ChocoTaco >.<

well, ttyl..

Sunday, April 24

happy easter!

well...i'm sorry to say, i hate easter. :| i just dont like holidays in general
i dont like any time where i have to dress up and see family
i like to dress up, but not for them...
they annoy me -.- i cant stand them
the family i actually like to be around is the side i never see.
i dont like it :/ but i guess i looked pretty, so here's my outfit...

blog later, byee...
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