describing me.
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Saturday, December 18

:D this is cute haha

happy birthday nicko :D

it's nick's birthday ^_^

i took this when he wasnt looking...
but he caught me xD
my baby's birthday is today :) he said he hates his birthday though...i don't really know why but he does. i didn't want him to have a miserable day though :( i wanted him to have a good day ^_^
so i did something super cute!
i made him heart-shaped pancakes~
they were pink ^_^ then put red sugar sprinkles on top to decorate~
i put my laptop and some syrup in my bag
and got to his house at 9AM...
he looked so surprised when i got there and so happy!
his face was red for a second and made me really happy :)
i stayed over for a little and we took some pictures on webcam~

i love that last pic <333 my new fav =)

and you know how i said if i saw him yesterday my day would be perfect??
i saw him yesterday ^_^
he's so cute! more pictures!
these are actually screenshots from a video i made that i'll upload very soon to my vlog :)

i love us <33 we're so silly~
we're supposed to eat at the chinese buffet today too :)
can't wait!! ttyl ♥

Friday, December 17

i am having a great day :D

the orchestra concert went very well! i actually liked it 
they did Carol Of The Bells and then the Show Choir preformed and did great 
props to all of you guys 


today in FMP, my day was made :)
one of the students i mentor, her name is Kristen, gave me a Christmas card!
right when i came into class she handed to me
my reaction:  ...for me?
she nodded  it made me really happy
i got a rice crispie too :) one of my favorites 
it really made my day better that someone actually thought of me..
sometimes i cant really tell the impact i make on people until they show me,
and then i feel really special :)

Kristen, if you read this, thank you so much!!!

now if i actually get up the courage to go to nick's then my day will be perfect ^_^
gonna go try to doodle now, ttyl ♥

m o w ?

quick note* my blog can now be viewed mobile!
kinda in a down-sh mood at the moment 
i had 4 different bad dreams @_@ so i was not happy at all 
2 pissed me off, then the other 2 made me sad
and they went in a checkered pattern...
i woke up super stressed and sad and didn't feel like going to school + feeling sick
blehhh (berry does not approve!!)
 but nicko cheered me up 
just a "hey baby" in the morning can cheer me up a whole day
crazy right? ♥
random edit inspired by Love Like Winter by AFI
that song is awesome i have always loved it ♥
well an update on the modelling thing, i got in!
the bad new...it costs alot.
you know how i talked about that i was going to start dance again and that my cell gets turned off after this month?
well paying for a cell phone, 12 dance classes +bus fare costs LESS than one month of modelling classes!
which is a lot :( i would have to choose between cell, dance and sometimes lunch/breakfast OR modelling.
i choose dance.
i know i want to model soooooo bad :( but i cant do it...
with no phone, me and nick would have a hard time together...
my family is already low on money and i don't have a job yet,
and i love dance, always have and i already know i'm good at that
i don't know if modelling would be good for me or take me anywhere, so i don't want to put in money i don't really have and risk my relationship over something i might not even be able to pursue.
if i had a job, i would try it out because i would be able to help pay
so maybe i'll try again when i get one and see how it goes...
but for now, i'm gonna start dance and get a new phone at the end of the month
that is what i need right now.
such angry thoughts right now >_<
i just figured out how much i hate that girl i'm jealous of!!,
because when i think about it, even when she's not being mentioned she's still causing a problem
because in one of nick's recent posts i was re-reading, he talks about past situations that bother him
which is what starts our arguments...
i don't do anything wrong, but because of something SHE did before, he gets mad at ME!
which makes me want to wish her death -_______-+
it really makes me sad that i'm good girlfriend and i know i am, but he still thinks about the past problems that i have nothing to do with and like...thinks i'm going to do the same thing
i love you Nick stop thinking about what she did and know that you have no worries with me.
because i will treat you like the beautiful person you are and you know i wont do anything to ruin that.
today there is an orchestra concert during school
i don't wanna go :/ i don't really like the songs they play...
i love classical music (i definately blame ballet for that one)
but i hate that they play the same songs every year -_-
i get bored so fast with that...you know?
ugh i am so bored and sick @_@
i feel like i'm gonna throw up on everything
blehh...once again i do not approve!
but i don't wanna go home cuz then i cant leave today
and i'm gonna go attack nick at his house xD
whether he wants me to or not because i havent seen him in god damn month!!!!
and i miss him  alot 
i really need to make some dividers, these dashes just aint doin it!!!
.....well i'm gonna go throw up now haha
i'll blog again later when i doodle again ^_^'
heh heh... well... see ya :D
*pukes everywhere*

i cant wait till our oldschool date ♥

Thursday, December 16

❄ ❅ s n o w d a y ❅ ❄

today we are off school....bout a half foot of snow on the ground and still snowin a ltitle bit still ~
was on the phone talking with Nicko earlier 
he's a cutieee  and his voice makes me happy 
all i've been doing today:
 playing sims
 eating pizza rolls
 talking to nick
 singing / listening to music
 being really cold 
i also posted some of my [ugly] baby pics earlier xD
but pretty please don't laugh at my uglyness~
i was fat and looked like a boy 
lately i've been wanting to create my own blogskin...
i really want a 3 column layout >_>
i'm so scared to chang my layout though cuz i've had the same one since i started 
mehh...i dont know >_> i'm scared.... i might get it though...

gosh that song has been so stuck in my head!!
Boomshake by Far East Movement...ahhh i love it 
my favorite song by them~

last night i found out nick took my beefee quiz 
he got everything right [wink.PNG] ya baby 
i knew he would get it right tho :P
i think 2 other people have taken it now, one person didn't leave thier name 
i was vewy sad  *sniff sniff* lol
theme song of the day:

- j a h a n e -
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