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Tuesday, April 26

who am i? have you ever asked yourself that question? well, sometimes you cant help it, you know...when your self-esteem gets the best of you and then you're stuck. it sucks. but it still happens. i think everyone knows how it feels...if they say they dont, then they're lying. when you end up being so down you wish you could be anyone but yourself. i always wished i wasn't me...i always wished my hair was straight, or my skin was lighter or to be taller...i always hated everything. i'm short, i'm racially confused, my mind is all fucked up, i have "talents" that will never take me anywhere in life and  my family is such a mess that for a while i didnt even want one of my own. when i think about my life, the first word that comes to mind is deprived. because i was...deprived of the truth, deprived of reality, deprived of real friends, deprived of real life, deprived of a dad and deprived of a loving family... i'm just entirely unhappy right now :( i need some really good fun in my life, i need to do things that i WANT. i don't ever do what i want. i'm so drained from yesterday.. on the other hand, i really like that picture,

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