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describing me.
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Tuesday, January 5

My Phobias ~


(unedited pic)
something most people don't know about me is my phobias...i have many (i didn't list some because it was innapropriate XD) but am now getting over some of them. so i thought i would share them with you all.


Chiraptophobia- Fear of being touched.
this lasted for a very long time. after 6th grade i didnt like to be touched, then i was afraid of it. when people would surprise hug me or poke me i would almost cry. when i had boyfriends from that time until 9th grade i didnt want to be touched at all. i would hug certain people but i really prefered not to. not only because i was scared but because i didnt feel that anyone wanted to touch me anyway. i had a bad break up with a boyfriend where i basically disappeared, we hugged sometimes but that was really all. after him, when i had boyfriends, they didnt hold my hand or hug me or anything like that - and definately never kissed. but i had a boyfriend in 9th grade, who is my dear friend now, who changed that. i met him because i dropped my pencil after art class one day and he picked it up and gave it to me, he figured out that his locker was by mine and he came over and said hi to me because we had the same friends. we ended up dancing at homecoming (he was the first guy i ever danced with besides dance classes) after that we ended up dating for a month and a half and he would give me hugs every morning and sometimes kissed me on the cheek. (he was the first guy to ever kiss me too, even though only on the cheek) even after we broke up we have been friends ever since and since him i havent been as afraid of touching people. thanks tony! :)

Astrapophobia- Fear of thunder and lightning.
its like a post-traumatic stress type of thing. when i was 4 and still lived with both of my parents there was a really bad thunderstorm. i yelled for my parents but they were in thier own rooms and couldnt hear me and my sister's crib was in thier room as well. i wasnt tall enough to reach the doorknob yet so i couldnt get out of my room. it was lots of thunder and lightning, hard rain and hail and i was really scared, not to mention the window...but i was really scared. whenever it storms i feel completely hopeless and at the first roll of thunder, the tears are ready to pour. Over the years, my fear has gone up and down but it never leaves. there was a couple times where i wasnt scared at all but those times are rare. im not as scared now because of a lucky poem i have, from a wonderful i fell in love with this summer :) just a fortunate incident where i read what he wrote and the storm calmed down...and i treasure it. always will :) <3

Athazagoraphobia- Fear of being forgotton or ignored or forgetting.
its more of the being forgotten part that bothers me...because to me, memories are precious. i try my best not to forget things because i have a really bad memory and im afraid i will forget things that i dont want to forget. i tend to forget good memories and remember the bad more vividly...im trying very hard to change that. being forgotten, to me, seems like one of the worst things that can happen to someone. sometimes its good to forget about someone if they hurt you really badly but its usually impossible... when people forget me, it breaks my heart. i feel so unimportant, its like telling me "i forgot you therefore you shouldnt exist" and it freaks me out to be forgotten...its one of my worst nightmares. when people forget things i tell them it really upsets me because im thinking "what are they going to forget next?" and i just hope and pray that they wont forget me..

Ereuthrophobia - Fear of blushing.
i get embarrassed really easily and blush alot, but i really hate to blush and when i do i cover my entire face with my hands. im afraid to reveal my blushing face!! its an odd fear...but it is there lol. one time somebody told me i had an ugly blushing face so i started to cover it then started to hate it, then i was afraid to blush.
 (i am still afraid to blush)

Meteorophobia - Fear of meteors.
i watched something on the discovery channel and that did it lol i'm afraid all the time that i'll look up in the sky and see a shooting star, but then the star crashes into the earth and we all die...its a horrible phobia but im getting over it a little, as long as i dont watch programs on meteors then i'll be fine.

Ommetaphobia – the fear of eyes.
 and Ophthalmophobia- Fear of being stared at.
they go hand in hand, im afraid of eye contact and people looking me in the eye. because to me the eyes are the gateway into a person's mind and i think they'll be able to see straight through me or read me directly and see my vulnerability and most times when people look me in the eyes i turn away immediately but every once in a while there are people who i let look straight at me.
i also hate to be directly stared at, it makes me feel like i'm being attacked, i dont show it but i freak out on the inside when people stare at me.

Psellismophobia- Fear of stuttering.
i had a bad stuttering problem around the middle of my freshman year of high school...some of my friends found it adorable, others and myself thought it was weird and annoying. i'm always afraid i will start stuttering again and i think while i'm talking to keep from stuttering, so you can tell when...


Taphophobia- Fear of being buried alive
i heard a story when i was little and i had dreams that it had happened to me, the dreams got worse as people ignored me because i thought that if i fell asleep they would think i died and bury me then not notice that i wasnt dead, it's a stupid phobia i guess but its there..

Wiccaphobia: Fear of witches and witchcraft.
there was this girl, i met her a long time ago, like a few years. well i drew a picture of jesus while i was at my friend's house and the wiccan girl lived with my friend. she said she didnt like my drawing and said she would cast a spell on me so that i couldnt draw for a long time. i laughed about it because i didnt believe it would work but after a few days my wrist started to hurt really bad on my writing hand and i couldnt draw anything good or write legibly for about 2 weeks...witchcraft has creeped me out ever since.

well thats just some stuff...not that anyone was interested, haha

1 comment:

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